With certainty 2020 has been different than years past. It’s probably safe to say that we’re all ready to move on from it, and return to something a little more “normal.”
Even in quarantine though, there is no shortage of wellness and movement options online. Every ex-gymnast or yogi seems to have their own program for purchase or on YouTube for free. So theoretically we should all be living our healthiest most optimized versions of ourselves right? Seems simple enough.
Furthermore, it seems as though every week (especially with Covid) we start hearing about “pre-existing conditions” being a factor in how well our body is able to fight off the virus. Well if we know diet and exercise can limit and even reverse pre-existing conditions, and there are cheap to free programs all over the internet, (nevermind pelotons, mirrors and all kinds of home workout equipment) then why so many pre-existing conditions when all the answers are right at our disposal?
Some reasons I hear quite a bit are – laziness, lack of time, money, or motivation. But there are many people who don’t exhibit these qualities in other parts of life, that seem to when it comes to a health strategy. I work with plenty of people that have these preexisting conditions, and believe me – they aren’t lazy or unmotivated at work. Of course that’s my own little sample size, but anyway it got me to thinking… the answer must be something different. I wanted to figure out the psychology behind what makes a person change from generally unhealthy to healthy. I can at minimum attest to what I’ve learned about myself with these challenges.
So here are some of the psychological factors that most served me in learning a little about training for life at a stage in life that might not be considered optimal for trying to learn to do the things that I want. I think they could apply to anything really whether it be running a marathon, reading more, meditating, or learning to play an instrument.
Practice starting This is by far the most important lesson I’ve learned. If I had known it earlier in life I cannot even imagine how much more I could have accomplished. However, I’m extremely happy that life didn’t pass my by without ever learning it and for that I’m grateful.
Most of the time fitness classes are an hour long. Personal training, a high school class, a session with a therapist, whatever. We’ve somehow determined that an hour once a week, twice a week or three times a week is the right dose of anything. (Except work of course that’s 8 freaking hours…but that’s a different subject).
But what I have found is that an hour of a fitness class is really like a 3 hour window. You have to get to the class, eat something before or after, warm up, rest, cool down eat something after, and socialize. All of a sudden your 6pm class is really lasting you from 5pm to 8pm. This is all well and good if it is already your routine. But if it isn’t…one day something will keep you longer at work or there will be traffic, or you won’t feel well etc etc. That’s why people suggest an accountability partner. But for me, if you can’t be accountable for yourself, why would another person make a difference? Cancelling is always just a text away. Then you cancel once, it becomes easier and easier to cancel. Next thing you know it’s next year already.
My solution- give yourself 5 minutes everyday in a space at home that you do something physical. At first I thought – you can’t get in shape with only 5 mins a day. You need weights, and programs personal trainers, and protein shakes and BCAAs. I suppose those things work to a degree, but to me the power isn’t in the amount of time, commitment, motivation, trainer, accountability partner or resolution at all. It’s in just starting. And then starting again. And making just starting so easy you have no excuse not to start.
That’s why I suggest using the timer on your phone and set it for 5 minutes. You just have to do 5 minutes. There should be no reason you cant fit that in no matter how busy you are. After you start 5 minutes day after day after day it starts to snowball. All of a sudden you look forward to it. It’s so easy you can’t miss a day. Then one day you do your 5 minutes and you decide to do it again 10 minutes. But don’t force it. That’s the key. Never plan on more than 5 minutes. Then when 10 is too easy and your family knows you need your 5 minutes you add another 5 when they’re not paying attention. Now you’re starting to get 15 minutes and you’re gaining momentum, rather than trying to figure out how you’re going to go to another boot camp class when you’re sore and tired and it’s easier to just go to tomorrow’s class. Before you know it you’ll have carved out so much training and grown accustomed to making it a part of your day. If it’s 5 by yourself and a 20 min walk later with a loved one or 30 minutes on the jungle gym with the kids-even better (yes you’re allowed to use the park while watching your kids – or at least I think you are). It’s all cumulative.
I use this for reading and for playing guitar too, and I’ve finished a book a month this year and can play many more difficult songs. It wasn’t an overnight thing. It just adds up over time. Why would I beat myself up about reading so few books, when 12 is probably 12 more than I’ve read in most of the other years of my life.
Being capable will equal looking capable, but not necessarily the other way around. Everyone is into health/fitness/wellness for a reason, but they’re not all the same reason. If your goal is only to look good on the beach, that’s a fine goal. But if you’ve found that difficult to maintain maybe consider trying to be as “capable” as possible and the beach part will follow as a side effect.
We live in a results based world. Measurables and metrics are used in every facet of life. But when I picture fit people – I picture people that can do stuff. Marathon runners look a certain way, NFL running backs look a certain way, and the world’s strongest man looks a certain way. These people didn’t set out with the goal to look like that. They set out with the goal of being capable in their field. Therefore, pick the genre of the thing you’d like to look like, and then do that protocol. If you can do the stuff or at least close you will look the part. Not (necessarily) the other way around. So it seems silly that generally do things in reverse. Doing funky things that those people NEVER do to look like them, when if we only tried to do what they do we’d actually get BOTH.
In these instances the looks are a side effect of the capability. Sure you could look like that and not be capable. That’s a possibility. But every ripped guy won’t be as fast as Usain Bolt. But every guy as fast (or close to) as Usain Bolt will be JACKED guaranteed. I personally chose gymnastics type stuff to focus on. Those gals and guys are buff and move with such ease. Plus it seemed like the most difficult thing for me since I’m tall and not flexible nor do I have good body weight strength by nature. So why not choose the hardest thing? Actually being a gymnast is probably not happening anyway, so no pressure.
Have a big goal, then forget it. Think of it like the show “Shark Tank.” An entrepreneur gets up in front of investors. They always have grand dreams (ie. the equivalent of getting in the best shape of your life) of changing the world with their product or idea. Usually one of the first questions the sharks ask is “what are your sales?” The answers always vary, but one thing never changes. The “sharks” want some proof. Aka they want there to be some sales at least before they invest. So in terms of fitness or whatever your goal is – what are your sales? Sure without the big goal you might not be clear on your course, but with no sales, you get no investment. Your sales in this instance are the number of consecutive days you start. On Jan 1 you might have no sales. But by Jan 31st if you needed an investment from a shark, would you be able to say you have 31 days of “sales?” For me I’d rather do this than buy a package of personal training or getting a new gym membership. It’s not a waste if you can only do 5-10 minutes It’s super important to break that myth that you are missing out if you don’t do the spin class or boot camp or run 5 miles. All of those things are great. But as I wrote before…if you’re not already doing those things, they seem like failure if you skip, and when life happens, missing class or the gym is inevitable.
We live in the world of instant gratification. But honestly if you had a goal of running a marathon in your lifetime, would it really matter if you ran it next month, in six months or next year? The point is, unless you put a little in everyday, you’re not going to get there anyway. Who really cares how long it takes as long as you are heading in that direction? Every day you don’t start, you’re staying the same.
Change your identity big, and your routine little. These are all variations of the same theme, and are really all tied together by Number 1 in the list. But they all vary slightly, and might shed a different light on how to approach the big audacious goals. When I started, I actually decided that I wanted to be an entirely different person. And the simplest explanation I can give was that I decided to go from a person that couldn’t do —- insert skill here—, to a person that couldn’t do that skill YET. That’s a very important distinction. Like I’m not a millionaire doesn’t really tell me anything about your goals. But saying to yourself “I’m not a millionaire YET” means to me that you are taking steps and anticipate accumulating a million dollars. This kind of ties into Number 2. As soon as I added the “yet” to the end of all the things I could’t do, I actually started accomplishing them one by one. And as I got more capable, I started to be more fit.
More skills=more play If you’re gonna start something new and have it stick, that thing either needs to “light you on fire,” or you need giant sized discipline to work through the times you don’t want to do the thing. So if whatever training or movement or boot camp you choose doesn’t light you on fire, consider making your training playful. Imagine the kids at the park. They are actually training running jumping climbing and sliding right? But they don’t realize it. They’re just having fun. So how do you make your training playful?
For me it was realizing that skills stack, but reps don’t. It’s that simple. 10 reps of anything equals just that. But having a one arm chin up would almost certainly have a ton of carryover to a muscle up. A back handspring is a walk over with a jump. The more stuff I can do, the more stuff I want to do. You will see that there is something new that you can do everyday that you work on skills you can’t do, rather than extra reps of stuff you can. Those extra reps might make you functional when your tired. But skills make you capable daily, and you will see more carryover to stamina, than you will see carryover from stamina to skills.
So if you’ve ever done a month of “classes” that repeat the same movements over and over and weren’t able to stick with it, or yoga and you didn’t progress to different poses, consider really tackling the skills over the repetitions. Might be a way to enjoy rather than grind.
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Thanks for reading.